Please....

I am begging, pleading even.....make the pain stop. I have lived too many days like this. It is interfering with basic functions. I can no longer walk upright, I require constant use of some kind of heated device, and my daily diet consists of various medications intended to quiet the demons to a dull roar. Enough. Really. Please.
I did manage to muster the strength and energy to tackle a surprise lunch with Small at school today...picked up a pizza, registered as a visitor, endured the symphony of elementary voices in a cafeteria.....the whole ordeal...while infinitely worthwhile and enjoyable...exhausted me. I ended up asleep on the couch...for the majority of the afternoon. When did I become so elderly?
And as an update to my mental state...I do still feel as if there is alot of crazy going on. I heard the ringing again today..thankfully it WAS actually the phone and others heard it as well. It's a start.
As I have, once again, medicated my feeble body...this will be a short entry. I can already feel the effects on my synapses....slower to fire tonight.
Today's reading entry..Day 3: 'There are six principles that will act as guides as we make our inner journey over the next year. First there is gratitude. Gratitude gives way to simplicity-the desire to clear out, pare down, and realize the essentials of what we need to live truly well. Simplicity brings with it order, both internally and externally.  A sense of order in our life brings us harmony. Harmony provides us with the inner peace we need to appreciate the beauty that surrounds us each day, and beauty opens us to joy.'
And these are the lessons I am trying to take with me.

......Psalm 2:10-12 Be wise now therefore, O ye kings: be instructed, ye judges of the earth. Serve the Lord with fear, and rejoice with trembling. Kiss the Son, lest he be angry, and ye perish from the way, when his wrath is kindled but a little. Blessed are all they that put their trust in him.

I am trusting...Amen.
Goodnight and God bless.