Bag Lady..

Today is a shitty day. That is all that can be said about it. It's one of those days where crying is really the very best option...not that it will solve anything...but it will sure as shit make me feel a hell of a lot better. Or yelling at someone. Or punching someone really really hard. Right in the throat. And since no one is volunteering to let me karate chop them in the larynx...looks like I'm back to crying.
This isn't one of those boo hoo woe is me moments. I'm not telling you this because I want you to feel fucking sorry for me or anything. I'm just preparing you for the next few minutes of your life spent with me. You can stick around...and read about all the shit that I lug around in my handbag...or you can bow out gracefully. No one will ever know the difference. Or blame you either way. That's a total lie...if you leave now...I will fucking hunt you down like a wild mangy dog and slit your throat while you sleep. Yeah...I won't really. But, just stay anyway...just in case.?

What Is In My Handbag?:

Let's just start at the beginning....there's a pretty pink wallet..that holds various debit cards, business cards, reminder cards, receipts, and photos. But no cash. So keep that in mind robbers and muggers. There's a pink cell phone..that got dropped in a pool once, so it's kinda jankey and really only serves a singular purpose. Instagram. Oh..and emergencies. So dual singular purpose. There's a teal planner..that helps me keep track of all the various shit that I have to do and what not. I'm old school, I like to write shit down on actual days and stuff. Oh sure, you can give me a reminder card...and 18 months from now...long after the appointment has come and gone (and I've probably missed it or rescheduled it)...I'll find that card and throw it away. Or keep it if it's got your number. Cause I don't remember those very well. There's a semi-blank journal..I say semi-blank because it's got little scraps of things that I need to remember written inside, like blog ideas, or quotes I found, or conversations I had with people...or just random things I needed to jot down but didn't know where else to put. Sometimes I will find an old recipe, or grocery list...that kinda pisses me off...because that's not what the journal is supposed to be used for. But..whatever. There's bobby pins and a barrette...to keep stray random hairs out of my eyes and from driving me crazy. There's an ink pen...for jotting stuffs down in the journal or the planner. Of course, usually I lose the pen, so it's a moot point anyway. There's house and car keys...so I don't get stranded. There's medication..that keeps me moving and happy. There's a Clif Bar..my diet is a little restricted right now...so basically I'm hungry, all the time. This calms the beast within. There's lotion..for those rough patches. There's my Kindle..just in case I have a chance to do some reading. There's a library book..because today I DID have a chance to do some reading..and that's WHAT I'm reading. There's sports physical paperwork..because we were just back from having that done for Small and Fall Sports. There's a USB flash drive..because I forgot to take it out of my handbag after I printed pictures the other day. There's chap stick and lip gloss..ummm...because I'm a girl. AND there's my camera and an extra charged battery...because you never know when inspiration will strike.

And THAT is why my back hurts and my shoulders hurt and I carry a cross body bag. Because I lug around a bunch of shit that I probably don't need but can't live without. Basically, the story of my life.

See ya on the flip flop side.


XOX!!