Guilty..

Today was a hard challenge for me. I have a ton of shit I probably shouldn't do but I do anyway. Because I like it. I don't really think of it as "guilty pleasure"...I think of it more like "it's my fucking life and I will do whatever the hell I want to because I fucking can." Or something like that.
But for the sake of argument, let's pretend I have vices and guilty pleasures. Let's pretend I'm not totally fucking perfect wrapped up in awesomesauce tied with a motherfucking pink ribbon. Let's PRETEND...

My Guilty Pleasure:

OK...it's Snapped. Or anything on Investigation Discovery. My guilty pleasure is wrapped up in a blanket on the sofa while bodies are wrapped up in blankets in the trunk. I can't get enough. I'm pretty sure I now have all the necessary tools, facts, and knowledge to commit the perfect crime. Here's what I have, in fact, learned.....bitches be crazy, husbands are usually either the victim or the suspect, they probably deserved it, exes always get revenge, and DNA is a total fucking bitch. For real...you can't get away with shit anymore. So don't even try. Got that all you crazy ex bitches?

Also....on a related, but completely unrelated topic..coffee. I love it. I'm not supposed to be drinking it anymore, but I laugh in the face of rules! HAHAHA! You can take away my gluten/dairy/freedom...but you'll never take away my caffeine.....yeah, I'm pretty sure that's not how that goes, but it works here. I am doing my best to make said coffee much more 'user body friendly'...you know, less sugar (and better sweetener options), and NO MORE CREAMER. Oh hell yeah...you read that right. It sucks things I can't even put into print here....I am looking into alternative creamer options. Soy milk...eh. Almond milk...eh. I will let you know when..AND IF...I find a suitable solution. I have my doubts. So...coffee. Total guilty pleasure.

Upon proofreading this blog post, it occurs to me that to those of you who don't know me (and some of you who do)...that I could, quite possibly, just maybe, come off as a complete and total psycho nut job. GOOD! My plan for ultimate universal domination is coming together quite nicely....one blog post at a time.
So...I'll keep watching my Snapped marathons, with my steaming cups of unhappy coffee. And you keep on with your vices and guilty pleasures...and we'll meet up somewhere in the crazy middle. No judgement here....

See ya on the flip flop side!

XOX!!